Without you
by homesickdelko
Summary: He cant imagine his life without her.


He'd put his dive watch around her wrist in case she woke up when he wasn't there. He wanted her to know that he was, wanted her to know she wasn't alone and that he'd alway be there for her, with her. And when she woke up she'd felt exactly that, felt safe and pulled together as she recalled the words she'd heard Eric say to her.

 _I can't imagine going to work without you_

 _I can't imagine living my life without you_

It was like a dream, she wasn't conscious but somehow his words stuck and broke through to her.

" _I knew you were here." He looked at her with a smile that made her heart clench, "how did you know I was here?" he paused for a moment, "could you hear me...? ...You heard what I said?"_

 _She nodded, looking at him with a smile he hadn't seen in a very, very long time, "yea."_

 _He watched her with question, nervous of her response, but as the anxiety crept up his spine it was her smile that give him some reassurance, "It was like a dream," she told him._

" _It was real."_

" _Will you stay with me?"_

" _No," he chuckled and she laughed. "As long as you want me to," he told her, sitting down. Never once when he'd walked into the room did she stop smiling._

And now here they were, Calleigh curled up beside Eric on her couch, watching a movie together while drinking through a bottle of red wine. She'd taken him up on his " _as long as you want me to"_ promise. He'd spent the night in the chair beside her hospital bed after she'd woken; she was up and talking with him a little while they kept her overnight for observation. He didn't move, not once, from her side. And the next morning he helped her discharge from the hospital, and when she asked him to stay one more night he smiled and rolled his eyes at the question she already knew the answer to.

And now her head had fallen on his shoulder a quarter of the way into the movie they were watching. Half way through he draped his arm around her. Fifteen minutes later she'd fallen asleep and Eric spent 10 minutes watching her before deciding that she should probably get to bed, so he swooped her up into his arms carefully. He knew had she been conscious she would have completely objected to him carrying her, but she wasn't, so he tucked her in carefully and before he could head to the couch she grabbed his wrist, "Eric," she murmured and he looked at her in the dark, "Stay with me," she requested quietly.

"Okay," he told her, smiling and squeezing her hand. Despite their cuddling on the couch, Eric still understood that there was a difference between a couch and her bed. Her bed was far more intimate than the couch, and the fact that he understood and respected the difference showed how good of a friend he was, showed how important their friendship was to him. Despite his obvious love for her, despite her knowing he'd do anything to tuck himself in beside her, he still respected the unspoken boundary. And it made Calleigh's heart clench and somehow she felt herself fall harder for him. A man that understood and respected untold boundaries was new to her. It put into perspective how different Eric is than all the other men in her life. Sure, she'd tell Jake she needed a day and he'd respect that, but it was because she _asked_ pretty firmly. Eric's respectful hesitation was something small, but it meant alot to Calleigh

He went around to the other side of her bed and carefully tucked himself beneath the covers, leaving a few inches of space between them. He could feel the heat of her body mere inches from him, he was surrounded by her, her smell, her heat, all of her, and he had the need to wrap his arms tightly around her and hold her close. He wanted to protect her, he needed to know that she was okay, needed to hold her close to him. Looking to do just that he hesitated for a moment before moving closer and putting his hand on her hip, giving her the opportunity to object, but she just scooted towards him and they both turned on their side to spoon, Eric's arm sliding over her side, pulling her close to him.

"Thank you," she told him.

He smiled and nuzzled his face into her hair, pressing a kiss there. She smelled of vanilla and Calleigh and Eric was in absolute heaven right now, "of course."

She laced their fingers together and Eric let their breathing fall into the same rhythm. Being able to be here and hold her tight like this, it's like time didn't exist, like it was just him and her and nothing else around them. They were tangled together and all Eric could do was savor the moment, just in case this would be the only time he got to hold her like this.

"Eric," She murmured softly.

"Yea Cal?"

She managed to turn in his arms and shifted so they were both on their sides facing each other, her head pillowed next to his. She gazed at him, watched him in the dark and ran a hand through the prickle of his hair. How she'd known him for as long as she had without letting herself fall in love with him, she couldn't tell you.

"Eric," she whispered again, their lips a breath apart, her hand stroking over his hair, wishing it was longer.

He touched his forehead to hers with an amused smile, "Calleigh."

She cupped his jaw and smiled at him in the dark, feeling her heart race a little as she brushed her lips lazily against his, barely a kiss. It ended as soon as it began, and when she pulled away she brushed her nose against his.

His hand cupped the back of her head, his fingers in her hair. He met her eyes before catching her lips in a slow, sweet, kiss. He was trying to just focus on keeping her breathing steady, but he felt this wave of love and attraction lined with anxiety crash through him. He'd waited so long for her, and maybe, under different circumstances, had he been there not because she almost died from smoke inhalation, he'd have been able to take it slow, but the fact that he almost lost her made it near impossible. He needed her to be okay, needed to be as close as possible with her. He deepened the kiss, his tongue teasing at her lip, letting her decide. She opened eagerly for him, her hand stroking over his head. She sighed into the kiss, swiping her tongue against his and he stroked his fingers through her hair, his other hand cupping her cheek as the kisses became stronger, more heated. He could feel himself becoming breathless, and that was his cue to break the kiss. Calleigh's lungs had had enough deprivation as is, he didn't want to make it worse.

Their foreheads were together and she smirked at him sweetly, "I wasn't done."

He laughed, his fingers still stroking through her hair, "when your lungs are healed up I'll take you up on that."

She shook her head with a smile, pressed her lips to his. "I don't wanna wait."

He stole another kiss, "I don't want to aggravate your lungs and end up needing to take you to the hospital again."

Calleigh smirked, knowing that it was unrealistic. She had an inhaler if she really needed it, but her oxygen levels were fine and she was given a good bill of health so she brushed her lips against his, thinking of both the fact that she _needed_ this and the fact that Eric would wind up giving in if she kept kissing him. She was right on that, he pulled her closer knotted his hand in the soft strands of her hair. When she nipped at his bottom lip he opened for her, letting her dip her tongue against his before deciding to take control of the situation. His hand on her hip tangled in her hair with the other as he pulled her close, their legs intertwined as their mouths heated up. She couldn't get enough of him, especially after how he'd taken care of her over the past two days or so. She couldn't hide her feelings from him anymore. It was tiring and frustrating and lonely. But now it was over, she didn't have to hide from him anymore, she didn't have to hide from herself or her feelings anymore.

Their lips kept brushing together over and over and over again. It was all she could feel, his lips, his tongue, his teeth. They were holding each other as close as possible and Eric felt like their bodies were going to melt into one. He felt one of her hands careen down to the hem of his shirt, fiddling with it for a moment before running her fingers carefully against his skin.

He broke the kiss with a small laugh, "Sorry," he told her with a sweet smile, "that tickles."

She smirked at him, pushing her hands beneath the shirt and over his heated skin, over the muscles that always made her look at him twice in the locker room or when in his wetsuit.

With her hands beneath his shirt she ran her palms over his abs and his chest, her nails scratching lightly over his skin. But she wanted his shirt _off_ , so she gripped the fabric of his shirt and pushed up, trying to get it over his head. He turned on his back and sat up a little to pull it off and drop it to the floor. He looked at her with a soft smile, a hand on her cheek. There was no doubt to where this was headed, and he needed to make sure that she was certain, that she understood the line they were about to cross. Regardless of how much he wanted this, needed this, their friendship was more important.

"Are you sure?" he murmured to her, turning back on his side to mirror her. Sneaky fingers met the hem of her shirt, toying with it while he waited for her answer.

"Yes," she pressed her lips to his for reassurance.

"We'll go slow," he promised and she nodded, fusing their lips together. One hand stayed cupping the back of his head, Feeling her hands on his skin made his kisses more frantic, more intense. His hand slipped beneath her shirt, feeling the soft creamy skin beneath the fabric. He was touching her just to touch her, to feel her. His lips broke from hers to look at her. He wanted to see her eyes, wanted to make sure that she was okay, wanted to give her an opportunity to change her mind about where this was headed. She nodded subtly and he licked his lips and pressed his forehead to hers, brushing their noses before capturing her lips gently. It was so tender, so raw it made her sigh his name and tremble. The way she sighed his name... He decided he'd do everything in his power to make sure he'd be able to hear it again and again, be able to make her sigh and moan and shake. His hand covered her bare breast, teasing at her nipple, and when he nipped at her lip all she could do was quietly moan his name again.

The teasing was endless, the tickle of his finger as they skated over her skin, her chest, until her entire body was tingling. And as much as she enjoyed this, enjoyed just feeling him touch her, she wasn't in the mood for teasing. Right now she needed to be _with_ him. And putting aside her embarrassment, she somehow found the courage to tell him.

"Eric," her fingers slipped beneath the elastic of his waistband. She was looking at him dead in the eye, completely vulnerable and open. It was a part of Calleigh that very few had the privilege to see.

"I need _you,_ " she told him, and to further her point she slipped her hand beneath the fabric and stroked him.

He grunted, her hand stroking him slowly. "Okay," he told her, brushing his lips to hers, "okay." He tugged at her shirt and she sat up and lifted both of her arms, tossing it to the floor and falling back on her side. The way he looked at her... She had no idea how she'd managed to fight her feelings off for so long.

He palmed her breast, squeezing and teasing at her nipple. His lips traced along her jaw as his free hand skated beneath the waistband of her sweats and panties to spread her legs. He stroked over slick skin and she gasped, her head falling back with a moan of his name. She blindly reached to push off his boxers, her hand brushing against him. He nipped at her neck and she grasped him, stroking up and down.

"Calleigh," he murmured looking at her, his hands moving to push off her pants. She kicked them off and tugged at his shoulder for him to climb on top of her. She turned on her back and bent her knees as he settled between her. She pulled him down for a kiss, her arms around his neck. He was holding himself up by his elbows while he kissed her so slowly she felt like time had stilled. And suddenly she felt him grind against her once, twice. She broke the kiss and moaned.

She reached between them to grasp him and guide him to her. Both of his hands cupped her face as his elbow held him up. "Look at me," he managed to breathe and her eyes met his and she saw that darkness again, the rawness of his love for her. She brought him to her entrance and then she reached both her hands to his hair and before pushing into her, he laced their hands together, pinned them down on either side of her head. She watched him as he slowly, so slowly pushed into her. He needed a moment to just feel her wet heat around him. She felt like heaven and he forced himself to take a deep breath and try to rein in his lust.

He kissed her sweetly and Calleigh wanted nothing more than to move her hands over his skin, his hair, everywhere, but for some reason she was okay with him holding her down, it was comforting in a way she couldn't explain. And then he thrusted once, pulling out all the way and pushing back into her. She gasped sharply, struggling against his hands. He decided to let them go and she cupped his face as he started a slow, easy rhythm. The slow, easy thrusts were near electric to Calleigh and for some reason she'd always felt that their first time should be tender rather than teasing, she knew it wouldn't be about sex, that it'd be about connection, about being close to one another, stripped down to absolutely nothing between them.

Calleigh broke the kiss to drop her head back and moan as little waves of pleasure shot through her. He sped up the pace a little until it had both of them panting. Her nails raked down his back, over his shoulders and he pulled out completely and pushed back in. She arched against him and the moan she let out was something he decided he'd do anything to be able to hear again.

She wrapped her arms under his, holding him tight as their mouths and hips met. She pushed back against him, his hips grinding against her center as he kept thrusting, trying to keep an even pace but she felt too good, he couldn't help it when it started to rise. She moaned and her nails bit into his shoulders as she felt him thrust deeper, faster, and when she squeezed against him he dropped his head to the crook of her neck. She could feel her body start to tingle, starting in her toes and rising through her entire being. She was close, he could feel it.

"God Eric," she breathed.

When she moaned his name he thrusted faster, harder. He was close, and feeling her flex against him was almost too much. He freed one hand and pushed it down between them to brush against her. She gasped and he felt her body begin to stiff. He did it again, his thumb brushing quick, hard strokes over her. He kept pushing into her, panting her name with each thrust and when he nipped at her neck she lost it, fingernails digging into his skin while her back arched and her head ground back into the pillows. She moaned his name as her entire body shook around him and he made sure to keep her going as he kept pushing, thrusting, and she couldn't quiet her moans as her body sparked with ecstasy a second time. His head fell in the crook of her neck and he felt his body still over her as his orgasm ripped through him with a heavy grunt of her name. He near collapsed against her, as they both tried to catch their breath.

That had been... indescribable, her entire body was still tingling and she could see his arms shaking as he held himself up by his elbows. She kissed him sweetly, both her hands on either side of his face, and then he pulled out of her, laid beside her on his side and gathered her into his arms. "God Calleigh," he murmured to her, pulling the covers up over them, "are you okay?" he asked quietly, his face buried in her hair. She turned in his arms to look at him, her arms wrapped around his torso.

"Yea," she told him, kissing him, "I'm great."  
He chuckled, "good," and kissed her again, and again until she broke away to meet his eyes..

"Thank you," she said.

"For what?"  
She smiled sweetly at him, "Not making me wait."

He smirked at her and she smirked back, "I'm just glad we didn't turn into a "Sex Sent Me To The ER" episode."

"That would be quite a situation for Alexx," she chuckled, pillowing her head on his chest with his arm around her.

"Oh no," he laughed, "no, no way. We're going to a hospital far away in Broward County."

"You'd really go 20 miles away just to not bump into Alexx?"  
"Wouldn't you? Have you _seen_ that show? The craziest shit happens. In this one episode this woman couldn't stop orgasming and she needed to go to the ER. Is that really something you'd want? To have to see Alexx while you couldn't stop coming?" He was teasing her with a dirty grin and she rolled her eyes.

"No I suppose not," she smirked, "though I'm sure you'd be pretty pleased with yourself if that happened."

"Alexx's presence would certainly silence any pride that I may have carried with me," he assured.

She chuckled and he smiled and kissed her temple, "you need to sleep," he told her, "let your body recover."

"Okay," she murmured to him, her body snuggled tightly against him, their legs tangled. He pressed a kiss into her hair, "Good night Calleigh."

"Goodnight Eric," she replied quietly and with the warmth of his body around her, with this new feeling of safeness, she fell into a deep sleep that she'd been deprived of for month.


End file.
